Splish Splash

In an attempt to keep the boys off the neighbor's new trampoline (freaked out about spinal cord injuries), we bought a slightly bigger wading pool for the boys. I felt sorry for Collin standing all by his lonesome next to the trampoline watching the other kids jump. (I know, I'm a sucker.) The new pool is 10 ft. in diameter and about 2 1/2 feet deep. The sides are too high for Cami to fall in. Shown above is Evan, decked out with swim goggles and the two inner tubes he thought necessary to keep himself afloat. We kept our little plastic 1 ft. pool for Cami. She's still too little for the big pool and would probably be overwhelmed by the boisterous splashing of her brothers in the big pool. As a result, I now sit on my lawn chair supervising the activities in two separate pools. The activity in the smaller pool is much more toned down than the activity in the larger pool.

On a side note, both boys passed their swimming lessons. The third time was the charm for Collin. He graduates to level 3, while Evan moves up to level 2. Hurray!

Out of the Mouths of Babes

A few days ago, we were in Target looking at Burt's Bees Shampoo. On the other side of the aisle were the cosmetics. Collin turns to me and asks, "Are those for high-maintenance ladies?"

Then, yesterday, we were watching old Mr. Roger's reruns on T.V. There was a gray-haired gentleman on there playing the clarinet. Collin asked, "Is that Beethoven?"

"No," I answered. "Beethoven died a long, long time ago."

"But," Collin protested, "This Mr. Rogers show was made a long, long time ago."

Kids don't have any concept of time, do they? Who would have thought Mr. Rogers and Beethoven were contemporaries?

Making a Splash

Monday was Evan's first day of swimming lessons. I was fully expecting shrieking, violence, stubborness, etc. I didn't think he'd accompany his class to the designated area of the pool. I didn't think he'd get in when instructed by his teacher.

We arrived at the rec center and waited on the bleachers for the teachers to arrive. I sat there bookended by both boys. We had informed Evan that he would be in the pool at the same time as his brother. Collin's teacher arrived first and summoned Level 2 swimmers. Evan got up to go with Collin's class. I told him this was not his class. Then I held my breath and waited for the meltdown. Nothing. Then Evan's teacher called for Level 1. I waited for him to affix himself to my leg amid very vocal protests. Nothing. He got in line behind his teacher with the other students. They walked like a mama duck and her chicks to the shallow end of the pool. The teacher hopped in the water and asked the children to sit on the pool's edge. She then ordered them into the water. I expected a shaking of the head and a crossing of the arms in protest. Nothing. He actually jumped into the pool! I let out a big sigh of relief. That was MUCH easier than I anticipated.

Evan not only got into the pool, he actually enjoyed his swimming lesson.

I tried to capture the moment on film but I was pretty far away and I'm not very tech savvy with the zoom. I zoomed as far as my limited photographic knowledge allowed. Shown above is Evan's class, seated on the edge, ready for their big plunge. He is the second from the left.

Now, if we could just get Collin to pass his third round of Level 2 . . .

One year ago today, we got up at 4:30AM and left Beijing, China for Nanchang, China. It was a two hour flight. Our bus broke down on the way to the hotel, but fortunately, the driver was able to fix the problem. We checked into the most beautiful hotel I've ever seen in my life and then set out on the long, hot walk to the two-story Super Walmart. We marveled at the similarities and differences between this Walmart and the one at home. There was a moving ramp with grooves that fit into the grooves of our shopping cart, allowing you to move from one floor to the next. We purchased bottled water and made the mistake of trying to lug it back to our hotel in the heat across busy roads where drivers do not yield to pedestrians. We had lunch and made attempts to nap (didn't work- our minds were racing). At 3:45 we took a ride on the elevator to the sixth floor conference room where we waited anxiously with the other four families in our travel group. At 4:00PM, Mr. Zhou, the director of the Fuzhou Social Welfare Institute, entered the room accompanied by five babies and several nannies. Only one baby was crying. We only had a couple of old pictures of Cami under several layers of winter apparel, so we weren't exactly sure which baby she was. Craig joked that, since we were only used to high-maintenance children at home, the crying one was probably Cami. The first two babies were handed to their mothers. The babies were calm, and one of the mothers was tearful. Then we were presented with the screaming baby. Scream she did. All my preconceived notions of how this day would go were thrown out the window. Craig forgot to capture the moment on film. I paced in an attempt to calm the baby down. I whispered "ChenChen" (name her foster mom called her) in her ear. I took her into the hallway, but the marble floors out there made the screaming seem louder. The hotel employees standing at attention outside the conference room stared. I finally took her down the elevator and outside. She heaved several big sighs (so did I) and then was quiet. The bustling activity on the busy street had caught her attention. We stayed out there a good half hour. When we returned, the orphanage staff was still there and Craig had asked all the questions that I had wanted to ask of them.

Our guide told us Cami might very well scream all night. Fortunately, she did not. The crying had exhausted her. Our guide also told us she'd seen this many times before and Cami would probably scream three days. This she did. Anytime she was not held in a standing position, she got really upset. But, our wise guide was right. On day three, she woke up a new and happy baby. She continues to be a happy baby (unless tortured by her brothers).

Several months after we got home, we were able to contact Cami's foster mother. We found out that she had been taken from her arms at 8:00AM the day we got her. She was driven to the orphanage supervising the foster care and then was placed on a bus with the other babies bound for the hotel. No small wonder she was traumatized.

Today is the one-year anniversary of our Gotcha Day! Some day Cami may choose to celebrate this day rather than her birthday. We will leave that decision up to her.

To this day, I cannot believe our long wait is actually over. It became so much a part of our lives. We are thankful and blessed to have Cami in our family. Had we been even two months later with our paperwork, we'd still be waiting, fourteen months later for her. God's timing is perfect.

I.A.G. and an Apple Tree

This afternoon I again laid the baby down for a nap. Craig went to a teleconference meeting for diabetes camp. The boys were in the yard. I was getting my shoes on to join them when Collin came into the house screeching (while the baby is sleeping, mind you) that Evan had an axe and was swinging it at him and at everything else. What!?! We had had a previous incident with an axe and I had instructed Craig that all axes must be put in a place where they could not be accessed by small children. So now I'm #1. wondering what's going on #2. wondering how on earth they got ahold of said axe and #3. terrified of what kind of damage the axe and the axe wielder have inflicted. I entered the backyard with Collin behind me to behold Evan chopping at the apple tree with the axe. Upon closer inspection, I discovered he'd taken off a little of the bark, but otherwise the tree looked OK. I confiscated the axe, put Evan in time out and followed the time out with a lecture on all the macabre things that could happen when an axe is used. I then called Craig at his meeting and asked how the boys got ahold of the axe. He said he only hid the small axes and hid the big axe behind the other tools thinking they wouldn't find it. Guess again.

This evening we went to a picnic for members of the I.A.G. (International Adoption Group) in our town. Cami is the youngest of the adoptees present. The adoptees present tonight were from Russia, China, S. Korea and Native American. Collin is not a huge fan of these meetings because he says they're "almost all girls." His affection for the female population has been on the decline lately. He did manage to find a couple of boys to play with and I don't feel for him because our neighborhood kids are mostly of the male variety. Anyway, we all had a nice time. Pictured are: The gang at the smores assembly table, Cami and Abby (age 4) and Cami eating her shoe instead of her pasta.

One Year and One Demolition

One year ago today we were ten hours into our 13 hour flight from Chicago to Beijing, China. Three of the five families in our travel group were on that flight. Thanks to seatguru.com, we had picked out choice coach seats at the back of the plane with a large space to stretch your legs between the seat and the window and a large space behind us so we could recline way back. The male flight attendant barked at all the old Chinese ladies on the flight and scared us half to death. The long flight did not seem so bad as it was almost like a mini-vacation where I could read uninterrupted, do crossword puzzles and lean against Craig. We flew over the the west coast, followed the west coast up through Canada, crossed over the Arctic where the outside temp was around -59 at our elevation and then down the east coast of Asia, over South Korea until we landed at 3:00 local time in Beijing. Talk about doing a number on your internal time clock. I then learned the real meaning of jet lag, a condition I thought wasn't real. We walked through the beautiful new Beijing airport until we got to customs. My passport was nine years old and the agent questioned whether or not it was me. Thanks, dude. That's what having two boys will do to you. I had aged. I pointed out the date on the passport and he let me through, to my immense relief. We picked up our bags and headed through to the unairconditioned part of the terminal. It was HOT. Craig was feeling the effects of food poisoning from the burger he ate at McDonald's in O'Hare and he had to sit on the floor and rest while we waited for an elevator. Our guide from Bethany, Joy, met us and became our best friend for the next few days. She rocked! We boarded a Bethany bus to the Days Hotel and Suites where even the hardest beds in the world (imagine just sleeping on your boxspring) felt wonderful after 20+ hours of travel.

Fast forward to today. Our little Chinese princess somehow discovered how to dismantle her brother's zebra toy box. She removed the large screws and had it in taken apart in large sections. We have no earthly clue how she accomplished this. See for yourself in the picture. She also had her first successful experience with a sitter, minus the presence of her brothers.

First babysitter and a concert

One of the reasons I started this blog was to share in the ups and downs of international adoption. Getting babysitters is a hot topic issue in the world of IA. There are some moms who put their adopted babies back in daycare after their six week maternity leave is up. There are some moms who don't leave them with anyone, ever, for years. I figured there has to be some sort of middle ground. Of course, all this depends on the individual child. Do they have minor or major attachment issues? Do they have special needs of some other variety?

Through the eyes of an IA child, they behold: Birth mom left me, foster mom left me (or so they reason), how do I know you're not going to leave me permanently, too?


After being very careful for a year to only leave Cami with a select few people (me, Craig and my mom), we decided to attempt an outing together with my parents. Thus, Cami was left with her first teenage sitter. The sitter asked if she could bring her friend and her mom vouched for the good behavior of this friend, so I said, "OK." I figured this would be a good experiment as it only involved about three hours in the afternoon. The sitters wouldn't have to feed the kids meals and wouldn't have to get them up in the morning or put them to bed.

Craig and I then went to see Lorie Line. She hasn't been to town since 2001. Her concert was awesome, as usual. I've never thought Lorie was outstanding in a technical sense, like, say Liberace, but she knows how to entertain a crowd and she appeals to all ages. She played everything from the "Beer Barrell Polka" (not my favorite) to the awesome hymn "It is Well With My Soul" to a song by Coldplay (Chris Martin's band- hubby of actress Gwyneth Paltrow). She has a 17-year-old playing violin in her ensemble, and he was outstanding. I could tell what the economy has done to concert attendance. The last time we went in 2001 the auditorium was full. This time it was about 2/3 full.

When we got home we could hear Cami screaming while we were still in the garage. The sitters said she'd been screaming for the last 20 minutes. 20 min. out of 3 hours really isn't all that bad, but what if we'd been gone longer? I don't know how long she might have continued. The sitters looked exhausted and Cami was exhausted. Collin kept giving her sippy cups of water in his motherly way. Shortly after the sitters left she produced what felt like a 10 lb. diaper from all the hydration.

So now I was in a pickle. I had booked another sitter for this coming Thursday because there is a workshop I HAVE to take to keep my state teaching license. The sitter I booked Sunday was unavailable, plus we want Cami to get used to different people. At the suggestion of a mom on my adoption web forum, I called the mother of Sitter #2 and asked if she could come over and play with Cami while I was home, which she agreed to do. So, the sitter came over this morning and things went quite well. I played with the boys intially and asked the sitter to play with Cami. However, I sensed my presence was awkward for the sitter, so I retreated upstairs and told her I'd come down and referee if the boys had a fight (not that that EVER happens.) I popped in and out of the room so Cami could see that I always return when I leave.

Here are a couple of things I've debated: 1. I've been told to get children used to one sitter. Problem is, one and only one sitter is not always going to be available every time I need a sitter. 2. I've been told adopted children do better when their siblings are left at home. However, our boys are such a handful, I don't know if that would make the situation better or worse?

The plan is to have the sitter come to watch Cami Thurs. while I drop the boys off at the home of an adult friend. I'm praying it goes well for all involved.

OOPS! I forgot to mention that today, for the first time, even after all her "trauma," Cami said, "I love you," to me for the first time. :)

Strip Artist

Cami is much more talented at dressing and undressing than her elder siblings were at this age. This is not always a good thing. The other day I entered her room after nap time to discover that she had pulled off her pants, ripped off her diaper, peed on the crib mattress and then fell asleep in the pee. I decided to take action before I had worse things than pee to deal with the next time. I read somewhere about a mom who said she had resorted to keeping the diaper on with duct tape. It sounded a bit extreme, but those who think so have probably never cleaned smeared poop off a crib. We decided to put the duct tape over the pieces of tape on the front of the diaper. At the suggestion of a friend, I have photographed this and put it here for all to see. Now you think I'm even stranger than you thought previously.

For the Birds

We had some leftover birdseed from a craft project that has been sitting around awhile. Craig decided to use it to feed the creatures for which it was intended. Because we do not own a birdfeeder, he put it in a bowl on the ground. As you can see, however, there seem to be creatures other than birds eating from it. It's nice to know we're helping out the local gopher population. Later, a redwing blackbird came along and chased the gopher away.

We are DONE!!!

This morning a social worker from our adoption agency came. China requires three post-placement visits: six weeks? (can't remember anymore), six months and one year. Today was our one year and final post-placement visit. Everything went very smoothly. I had the boys take turns playing on the computer for 30 min. each to eliminate sibling rivalry. I also told them if they were good, they could have a dollar. The SW was very impressed with Cami's speech and her pleasant mood.

Anyway, she said she was going to highly recommend that the adoption be finalized. Yaaaaaaaaayyyyy!!!! We are FINALLY done with a process we began at the end of 2004.

Evan did have to make Mom and Dad sweat at the very end of the visit. As the SW was getting up to leave, he said, "Do I get my dollar now?!?" Sigh.

This stinks!!!

Well, today was the kids' first day of summer vacation, and what a day it has been. All was going relatively well until after lunch. I had just tucked the baby in for a nap and was prepared to take the boys outside to play in the sandbox. Playing in the sandbox is something we can only do when the baby is napping. Cami likes to sit on the boys' sandcastles, which, of course, doesn't go over well with them.

I digress. Anyway, I opened the door connecting the house to the garage when a foul odor greeted my nostrils. Skunk! It smelled as if one had just sprayed in our garage. I ordered the boys back into the house. We then exited via another route, out the walkout door in the basement. It is then that I spied a little black and white critter scampering around underneath the spruce trees in our yard. I yelled at the kids to get back into the house, ran upstairs and dialed the number for the animal control officer. I was informed that he was out for lunch and did I want to leave a message? I left my message, but expressed concern that it might be gone before an officer got out here. I then observed the skunk make its way across the road and into our neighbor's backyard. They have a ravine behind their house. I called my neighbor (who also has little kids) to warn her to keep her kids inside, but no one was home, so I left a message. After a period of time and no reappearance, I figured the skunk was long gone, so back outside we went. I settled down into a lawn chair when I spotted the little critter back under the spruce trees again. For a second time, it scooted across the road in front of a car moving very cautiously. For a second time, I ordered the kids back into the house. For a second time, I called the police and requested that someone come out here RIGHT NOW. After about ten minutes, the animal control officer appeared with a gun. I told him where the skunk was last seen and he headed off behind the neighbor's house. He walked the ravine until I saw him take aim and shoot, twice. This happened at the exact same time our neighbors pulled up to their house. They arrived to witness a police officer in their backyard shooting something in the ravine. Great! I ran over to their car to explain the situation. The officer returned and told me he'd shot two and would be back shortly to clean up their remains. I ran into the house to shut all the windows as there was now a horrible stench in the air. The officer returned and put the skunks in sealed buckets while five very curious little boys watched. He informed me that there was a mom and one large baby. He also informed me that skunks can have up to six babies, so there might be as many as five other juveniles at large. Great! He also informed me that 70%, especially in populated areas, are rabid. Great!

I needed to take a nap after this whole experience.This is shaping up to be an interesting summer. To think when I started this blog yesterday I wondered what I'd write about. :)